My mom told me I was lucky because I could pass as a man and woman. She then continued to insult transfems by saying "unlike transgender woman where you can tell "ooh that's a man"" and I wanted I stab her in the eye with a rusty fork. It's so stupid to say I'm lucky in response to dyphoria and what she said about transfems is honestly discusting
I always found this stupid. Of course you can tell if they don't pass, because if they do pass, THEN THEY PASS
i think people should stop doing things like, for example, a trans woman commenting on a trans man’s post saying “being a boy isn’t as great as you think” and vice versa. Sure, she can think that way but for some people, being a boy is great.
Like how hard is it to say "being a boy *isn't/wasn't* as great as you'd think *for me, but I hope you can be happy as yourself*
Or even just... not say anything?
Sorry to hear that this is a problem, you have my support if it matters. Hope to see people spread love and respect, it's something that everyone deserves.
You're completely right, we need to be better about including and validating our trans brothers and transmasc siblings
Whenever I see some fellow trans girls talk about shit like “fuck T, All my homies hate Testosterone” I’m just like “transmasc homies tho” like wtf
Man, fuck <shitty AGAB hormones>. All my homes hate <shitty AGAB hormones>
It is kinda alienating. Like, most of the online presence I see tends to be transfem people who say things that feel sorta just...bad. Most of the time I just upvote the post and move on, because it's just, yk, the way it is. Let people have their memes, I don't care really.
The whole thing about vilifying masculinity, on the other hand, made me feel really really really horrible. I felt like I was becoming the problem, and that if I did actually shift into more masculine territory I would become a bad person. Stuff like 'oh yeah men are horrible, I can't see why anyone would want to be one' are things that I hear a lot, and it kinda hurts.
I know it's only because most of the online presence of people in trans spaces are trans women, but the general frequency of these statements sorta made me avoid spaces like r/traaa and r/egg_irl. Like, I see them on my dash, but I don't go to the sub itself unless I sort by flairs, and that's mostly because the sheer amount of content that's all like 'oh T is a poison and no one should want it' makes me feel bad.
Thanks for bringing it up.
I also see a lot of "men/ masculine features are unattractive", people hating the fact that they are attracted to men, being so grateful that they are not attracted to men, or masculinity is attracted on women but repulsive on men. I see this stuff in queer spaces in general. It all hurts so much, and like you said, it feels like I'm becoming part of the problem. It definitely doesn't help because I already feel like I'm unlovable for being trans. Then it makes me think no one wants a man anyway, and I'm making the biggest mistake of my life
Yeah, testosterone is poison for me, but it's like food allergies. Would someone who's allergic to peanuts be mean to someone who likes peanuts? Hopefully not, and if that same person who liked peanuts were to be allergic to say, shellfish, it would not be good of the person who can't eat peanuts, but can eat shellfish, to shame them for it
Of all communities you'd think we would be the last one to have bigotry in our ranks. But sadly some people take their depression and repression out on others no matter what. Don't forget to love each other, and yourselves.
sending this to my transmasc friend brb
hello my kings, you are also amazing people who deserve your masculinity.
There was a recent post on r/ftm that had some similar thoughts. The guy pointed out that a lot of irl spaces that advertise as "trans spaces" only recognize trans men on special nights. It's like we only count as trans when other people decide it is convenient to let us. And before people say "well if there were just more of you or you were more vocal..." there are thousands of us. But when a space advertises as a place for *all* trans people and then pushes trans men into the garbage we don't want to exist around you very badly.
This is an interesting observation. I have pretty much the opposite experience. In the very few irl trans spaces I've been in, they were mostly dominated by (afab) nonbinary people and a handful of trans men. I could probably count the number of trans women I've actually met on one hand
people say they like my flair, but they never ask what my knife is for
*next time you get some of this truscum bullshit just call my name, k?*
i shall invoke your assistance when need be (and i cordially offer you mine in return)
\*Me when people say these things\* "Stop it, get some help."
PEOPLE ACT PIKE THIS!!???
I can understand why someone would say testosterone is poison, because to transfems it is. But if you’re going to say it in a post that isn’t completely targeted at transfem people that’s just being shitty. In absolutely no scenario should you ever call a trans person “lucky” for their birth sex. I haven’t seen much of it but it needs to be snuffed out.
thank you for saying this! it’s kinda been on my mind for a while too haha
^ This. I'd love to see more of us transmacs exist in a space that's for all trans folk and not get drowned out or see a lot of inadvertent hate. It sucks.
amab trans person here, 100% agree, but why the hell did you use folx? folks is already gender neutral
Thank you for this
I've been seeing a lot of trans mascs talking about how they're seems to be a lot more trans femmes than trans mascs in r/traaa and I would recommend that while you stay here (cus we love and support you all) you guys also check out tumblr, which is the opposite.
*People do what?*
I don't spend much time in trans spaces, so this subreddit is where most of my knowledge comes from, but honestly *what the fuck is happening in some spaces*
Sexism is sexism no matter who's victim. Jeez fricking christ I didn't think that people need to be told this so often
Sexism toward masc people does not make anyone better nor it's "feminism". *It's still sexism*
Being AMAB and having dysphoria because of it is like a testosterone allergy, not everyone is allergic like us. There are some people who really like that masc juice
Thank you. I am a rather masculine trans woman and I had to tell too many trans woman to knock that shit off. Same people who give me shit for liking sports and playing golf, like...this doesn’t take much thought to realize you’re basically doing the same shit that toxically masculine people do.
Love all you trans men out there <3 we have different journeys, but in a way the same!! We are our best allys!
I like to think that I’m allergic to it, not poison everyone else but it makes me hurt
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